“Don’t get mad” were the first words that came out of her mouth when I called in response to her “Please call me” text.
It happened yesterday.
For the good part of the afternoon, I was preparing for our 10-year wedding anniversary. Reservations were made at The Inn Of The Seventh Ray (considered to be one of the most romantic restaurants in the Los Angeles area); I sent her a vase full of roses straight to her office, I wrote a short one-line love note, strategically placing it under her pillow (which she found later that night before she went to bed).
The house was clean and I was ready to dazzle her.
It was on.
Until I heard those formidably prefaced three letter words: “Don’t get mad.”
She goes on to explain the situation in further detail, “I crashed the car into a post after I almost drove it off of the parking platform.”
At first it sounded like a 10-Year Anniversary Fools joke.
I didn’t believe her.
“I’m serious,” she says, hoping that I’d soon realize the she was indeed serious.
I couldn’t believe it.
There are 365 days in the year and today was the day she was going practice her stunt driving skills … on our 10-year anniversary.
A host of thoughts came rushing to my head (after I made sure not to go berserk on her – which would have only made things worse.)
One of the thoughts that came to my mind was “Was I subconsciously being slapped with the Resentment Stick?”
Did she really want to ambush this celebration at a subconscious level out of resentment for something in the past? That’s just ridiculous, right?
The situation was so surreal, my mind starting playing tricks on me.
Of course she wanted to celebrate this milestone, just as much as I wanted to celebrate.
Calling an anniversary audible for when your wife drives the car off a ramp.
By this time it was around 6 o’clock (our reservations were for 7:30, but in LA rush hour traffic it’s very easy to spend a couple of hours on the road).
A tow truck driver had come by and get the car off of the ramp without inflicting any more damage to the car (the first tow driver got into an accident and had to call another to come help her out!)
Despite the craziness, I was still determined not to let my wife’s inner Evel Knievel derail our romantic night out. It was an accident and I didn’t want her to feel bad about it.
That stuff happens to everybody.
After cancelling our original reservation, I tried to set one up at a less romantic, but closer restaurant that we could head over to when she got home.
But by the time she got home, the both of us were hungry and disappointed.
“Honey let’s go out to this other restaurant in the neighborhood. It’s right around the corner.” I said.
“No. It’s fine.” she replied.
“But …” I attempt to rebut.
She interrupts “No. Really, let’s just get something quick to eat.”
I reply “We’ll reschedule our 10-year anniversary for another day.”
She agrees and I ask her if pizza is o.k.
“Sure” she says.
So we ordered a large pizza (half cheese and half pepperoni) and watched The Firm. That was our audible call for the night.
Far from ideal, but still a wonderful evening.
Both my wife and I would agree that the outcome of our official 10-year anniversary was far from ideal, but we still enjoyed spending time with each other.
We made the best of a ridiculous situation.
The damage to the car was minimal, she wasn’t hurt (other than her ego a bit), and we still plan on celebrating our ten years of marriage at The Inn of The Seventh Ray.
But what I learned was that if this had happened ten years ago, I probably would have freaked out hard core. Angry and critical, only making the situation worse.
As a husband, it seems as though I’m learning. And I hope you are too.
As long as she wasn’t trying to intentionally get out of celebrating our marriage, I’m a happy camper.
From one husband to another,