Most people that you know are just acquaintances in your life.
If we were to take Pareto’s Law into account, you might even say (and this is a very generous assumption) that only 20% of those in our lives account for 80% of the richness, growth, and support we ever experience.
These people that impact us in a positive way are our friends.
But unless you have taken exceptional care when building your close sphere of influence, the majority of people in your life are simply acquaintances of some kind.
Work. Social media. Church. Or wherever else you develop bonds (some stronger than others) with people with whose paths you have crossed at any given point in time.
But how do you differentiate between a friend and an acquaintance? Is that relationship something that “just happens” or is it a deliberate process?
True friendships are built, just like marriages are.
That’s why it seems so natural that our wives tend to become our best friends in life: because they put more time in than anyone else around us.
That’s what makes them our best friends.
(At least that’s what makes my wife my best friend.)
They are the most invested. So it is safe to say that …
A healthy marriage and true friendship go hand in hand.
Assuming you are in a healthy marriage (and I hope you are), you probably consider your wife to be your best friend.
Hopefully she sees you in the same light.
It’s only natural.
You both know each other. You support each other (financially, emotionally, spiritually, and physically, if need be).
The relational pretenses have melted away and you are down to brass tacks of life and all of the challenges and triumphs that it offers.
Your collective wisdom and resources are attributes that could never be achieved in isolation.
When the circumstances of life get gloomy, you both stand side by side, committed to weathering out the storm.
And as you reap the benefits of your hard work and resolve, you both revel in joy together, as a cohesive unit.
That is friendship … and it doesn’t come by chance.
But do you recognize it?
Friendship in marriage at risk of being underrated.
Friendship in marriage is the gateway to the most important romantic relationship of your life.
Acting like a positive enabler, it gives the friendship that you share with your wife a certain kind of power in your marriage.
If you tend to your friendship, it will reward you. If you neglect it, you will deprive yourself of its marital benefits.
Friendship is fundamental to your marriage.
But as humans we have a need to complicate matters; we attempt to do twelve thousands things a couple of times, instead of doing a couple of things twelve thousand times.
Building and maintaining friendships with our wives is basic. Rudimentary. It’s not sexy, yet I have a sneaking suspicion that it is underrated in marriage.
Not because I’m judging people and their respective roles in their relationship. No. I’m not qualified to do that.
It’s because I understand how easy it is to take the friendship my wife and I share for granted.
And I can’t imagine that I’m the only husband out there who has underrated his wife’s friendship at one point in his marriage.
Cherishing the friendship you share with you wife will give you a different outlook.
A fresh paradigm, a new perspective.
The monotony of life has a tendency to wear us down.
It will suck the joy and enthusiasm from our life, if we let it – robbing us of our provision and ambition.
Convincing us to take those things that we should cherish the most for granted; the most valuable friendship we will ever have, being one of those things.
BEWARE: As the elements of daily minutiae press on, take care not to relegate your wife to a mere acquaintance.
If your wife isn’t your best friend, you’re missing out.
She should be. And you should be hers.
Adopt that belief, that underlying philosophy, and you’ll have a renewed outlook in your marriage.
One full of support, empathy, and sincerity.
From one husband to another,